Newsletter – 30 November 2017
November 30, 2017 Newsletter
Yet again, we’ve seen a budget that simply didn’t take the armed forces into account at all at a time when our boys and girls in uniform are needed so badly. Everywhere you look there are cuts; even to our beloved marching bands and no end in sight.
With the new Defence Secretary – only weeks into his post – demanding talks with the Chancellor, however, this may be a temporary situation. We can only hope that our forces start to see some improvement in funding before morale plummets.
To end on a positive, don’t forget to enter our Christmas Hamper raffle which is guaranteed to put a very festive smile on the winner’s face!
Drop us a line on [email protected] if there's anything you'd like us to add to this newsletter.
Do you have any news you think we should feature, or any areas you’d like us to cover? Email us at:…[email protected]
You could be eligible for a university degree in management
A university degree in management can lead you into a worthwhile second career. Your rank could make you eligible for an online MBA at a prestigious UK university. Even if you have a specialist skill, a university degree in management is particularly relevant as your next career path should take you into management.
www.onlineuniversitymilipol.com works with military and ex-military candidates worldwide. We pilot you through the university acceptance process by turning your Services experience into ‘academic points’ so that you are offered an online university place with LSM (distance learning associate college of Anglia Ruskin University). There is no charge for this work, as it is paid by LSM, so you can find out if you comply without obligation. We remain with you throughout your study and will even attend the graduation ceremony on your behalf if you are abroad.
The cost of online study is significantly less than that of attending university and, more importantly, you do not need to stop working whilst gaining your degree.
One of the big advantages of online study is flexibility, particularly when you are unable to commit to a fixed weekly schedule. You might even finish earlier than an attending student if you are able to put in more time but your qualification and benefits will be exactly the same. Additionally, you can start after acceptance rather than waiting for the next year like an attending student.
Do you have an event or appeal you’d like us to publicise? Email us at:…[email protected]
Do you have any reunions you want to let everyone know about?
Just send in your name and details of how interested parties can get in contact. Also let us know the details of the reunion — who it's for, place, time etc. and a website if there is one, and we’ll include it in our next newsletter.
Email us at:…[email protected]
We Like to be social
A man walks into a restaurant, followed by an ostrich.
The waitress asks for their orders. The guy says, "A hamburger, fries, and a coke," and turns to the ostrich, "What's yours?"
"I'll have the same," says the ostrich.
A short time later the waitress returns with the order. "That will be $18.40 please."
The man reaches into his pocket and, without looking, pulls out the exact change for payment.
The next day, the guy and the ostrich come again and the guy says, "A hamburger, fries, and a coke."
The ostrich says, "I'll have the same."
Again the guy reaches into his pocket and pays with exact change.
This becomes routine until one night they enter the restaurant and the waitress asks, "The usual?"
"No, this is Friday night, so I will have a steak, baked potato, and salad", says the guy.
"Me too," says the ostrich.
The waitress brings the order and says, "That will be $42.62."
Once again the guy pulls the exact change out of his pocket and places it on the table.
The waitress can't hold back her curiosity any longer. "Excuse me, sir. How do you manage to always come up with the exact change out of your pocket every time?"
"Well," says the guy, "several years ago I was cleaning my attic and found an old lamp. When I rubbed it a genie appeared and offered me two wishes. My first wish was that if I ever had to pay for anything, I would just put my hand in my pocket and the right amount of money would always be there."
"That's brilliant!" says the waitress. "Most people would wish for a million dollars or something, but you'll always be as rich as you want for as long as you live!"
"That's right. Whether it's a gallon of milk or a Rolls Royce, the exact money is always there," says the guy.
The waitress asks, "But, sir, what's with the ostrich?"
The guy sighs and answers, "My second wish was for a tall chick with long legs who agrees with everything I say."
If you want to contribute to the jokes in this newsletter, just send them in — email us at:…[email protected]
For various reasons we can't always include them in the newsletter, but we always appreciate them!
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